Bloomin’ Bidets

For weeks now we have trawled through the net looking up bidets. This has taken many many hours…

Having MD means going to the loo is an exhausting experience when you can’t balance or move your arms much. I get all puffy and pain in my back amongst other things like needing help from hubs or my PA.

A better way to feel fresh and more human is to use a bidet – something that is not so common in the UK but standard in many other parts of the world.

The type of unit we looked for was basically one that replaced your toilet seat and you plug it into the mains and connect up to the water supply. It had to have a remote control unit with easy press buttons and specific functions.

The seat shape and bevel is critical and I found a model that looked ok. These things cost £500+ but would have had to travel to Bristol to take a closer look at one I found so that wasn’t so good.

So I got surfing again and saw another make – the Biobidet 1000. Read up on all the data sheets and manuals to check it out. More hours of searching and I found our local mobility shop could demo it. I arranged for a shop demo and we had an exciting Saturday trip out to see it in action! Also found one installed the other side of the M25 I could actually sit on.

The price of going to the loo and gaining some level of dignity was apparently £1200 . *faints. This included a bathroom assessment and fitting it.

Firstly we have to install it ourselves it because it’s going on my existing toilet riser (seat raises up so people can get me off easier without lifting). Secondly, the model comes in two sizes (round [UK version] or elongated seat [US/Europe]). We need elongated that is not stocked anywhere.

So more hunting for the elongated version and e mailing companies.

The UK distributer had a 10 week wait to get one in but ten more weeks of struggling was not ideal.

Then a mobility shop up north had them on their website. Hubs e-mailed them and got a 3 word reply and a badly composed e-mail signature! Immediately it didn’t feel right. We felt they didn’t deserve business if they couldn’t put a sentence together. Desperate though, we mailed them again and got an email saying ‘call to order’. More ‘gut feelings’ that this was a bit iffy so I found the owners blog. The person says in his signature he won a business manager award recently so I checked him out.

The guy has an impairment and ‘wants to help people’ so set up a disability equipment company. Alas he demonstrated, in our case, a complete lack of business skills. I suspect the business award was rather tokenistic…? An award and a desire to help does not a profitable business make. Basically, he said he had sourced the item and I spent some faffing about getting money transferred into his account. He didn’t seem to have a grasp of HMRC requirements for VAT relief or how to cost postage.

Then later that day the e-mail copy of the invoice came through… yes folks, he only went and substituted the model we wanted for a completely different make! He said he was told it was a better model (ehm of course the person you obtained it from is going to say that – they know how to do business and push a sale!!). What company in their right mind sends customers alternative versions of what they thought they had bought. So now it’s got to be sent back and reimbursed. The guy apologised but that’s not the point!!

Oh and the name of the bidet he sent… Blooming Bidet lol.

So back to the drawing board… Saw a company on Amazon, contacted them, did VAT paperwork and they took my order and posted it yesterday. It cost us a lot more than we intended to pay but there we go. Let’s hope the right product arrives today…


3 thoughts on “Bloomin’ Bidets

  1. I am thinking of getting the gerberit bidet toilet with electric height adjust and remote control. Only thing is that the arms are not powered, which seems really stupid to me, given the types of people who are going ot be using it! Did you think about getting a complete unit, or is that just too far out of your budget, given you already have the riser? I can’t manage on the toilet seat add-ons as they don’t seem sturdy enough for my side transfer.

    • I could only see these in the Gerberit range and the actual height of the toilet doesn’t rise as in lowering and raising electrically. Do you have the link?

      The standard UK instalment for a bidet is the closomat one (of which one model is a vertical toilet riser). However, this is not on a remote control – you can press a button located on the arm rest. It also doesn’t have many actual bidet functions bar a basic wash which is a shame. Each unit still uses a shape of toilet seat which people with wide hips (due to muscle weakness or joint problems) such as myself find painful or tips you off balance. A badly shaped seat can actually flex the bowel and make going to the toilet physically impossible for some people (which the bidet companies don’t seem to cater for – and the solution is so simple as well!).

      The bidet’s that are the seat type are heavily bolted onto the toilet pan – so I doubt people would have problems with displacing it during side transfer – my normal seat is bolted onto the riser frame at the moment and it’s really rigid – the Biobidet in the shop looked very stable for the demo we had.

      • I know there is a height adjust geberit because I tried it out (at least transferring) at the Naidex South exhibition last year. Know what you mean about Closomat – I can’t use it either! Will have a look for that link although not finding it so far.

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